oh my i've got so much to say that i don't know where to start.
first of all thank you everyone who was there cheering us on- you don't know how much you all mean to me. and thanks to the j1s for being so conscientious in wiping the boats, affixing the number plates, bringing food, washing boats, and all the other small things that we mightn't have noticed.

first race of the day was open women's k2 250m. quite jittery in the morning, i mean, we weren't even supposed to do 250s in the first place, but the protein bar and my trusty lifejacket no. 10 calmed me down quite a bit! luckily we had warmed up first by trying the racecourse and all. leqi and i were assigned lane 3. when the airhorn was blown we just chionged! gosh i don't even think there was much of a difference between our starts and maintenance. lost sight of the other boats out of the corner of my eye after the first few strokes, and that's when i knew we were going to win. the feeling of gliding through the finish line at top speed. god that sprint was over in a flash. but it really got the adrenalin pumping and the feeling of my first ever win in canoeing was exhilarating!

under-19 women t2 500m was great too. carol and i set out from the very start to claim the title which we didn't even come within sniffing distance of last year to some blatant cheats. this was probably the event i had the most confidence in, knowing that it was highly improbable that we'd have any chance of capsizing and unforseen wobbles. hahaha. surged forward from the very start, progressively widening the gap- gosh it was probably the best 500m i'd ever rowed in a t2. almost had the gliding feeling of a k2, that's how good it felt. it was a fantastic race too.

under-19 women k2 500m! my last race of the day and leqi and i were both determined to walk away with our third gold. man what else can i say but that we both went all out for that race. gave it all we had and we made our dream come true. take that, njc.

carol carol carol! god i still can't believe we managed to fulfill our dream of stopping paddling before the end... because we knew that nobody'd be able to catch us. well we did it. oh and sorry if i yelled at you haha. and we avenged our loss! way to go, girl! and congrats for t1 too. you rowed darn well. i'm really proud of you. love you.

thanks so much leqi for the beautiful 250m and 500m. we knew we'd do it right from the beginning, when we started training together. yet the results were more than i dared to fathom... the fact that we managed to beat the other boats by a couple of boatlengths as we'd wanted to all along and coming in with spectacular timings. even after the initial glitch in 500m heats we didn't let it affect us again and rowed most perfect races possible in the finals. see i told you we'd fly. us and RJC 13. and bananaman and rjc10. thank you thank you thank you. i love you, partner. we're gonna chiong for nat'l jnr kayaking c'ships. let's show them. you did great for k1 too! damn zai can. thrashing nj every step of the way.

girls: even though we didn't manage to hang on to the sdba title this year... we know that this year nj isn't out of our league! the nationals title isn't merely a dream, it's an achievable goal. let's work towards it. we can do it if we all train hard and focus. let's go!

first day of heats for SDBA.
t2 was good, k2 was good save for a minor screw-up
but things can only get better!

k2 250m open tmr. all psyched up and raring to go. last minute alteration from 500m to 250m but it's okay, we'll go all out all the same.

good job, all my teammates. you went out there and gave it your best. whatever the result was, i think you all deserve a pat on the back. we showed the other schools we're no pushover.
all the best for semis and finals.

to my t2 partner: oh god we fulfilled our dream of gliding through the finish. let's see if we can replicate that feat on sunday! no sweat man. oh, and sorry if i yelled at you. hahaha.

to my k2 partner: let's go out there and kick some ass! no more wobbles yeah? i've effectively erased that image from my mind and now all that's left is the prospect of rowing like there's no tomorrow. let's chiong all the way!


-- raffles canoeists --

raffles canoeists '04:
this is the curtain raiser, only the beginning of better things to come
let's give it our best shot.

we've been training for a year now. this is our first real opportunity to make things count, to make the countless trainings worth it. it's our chance to show others what we're truly made of, to justify the dedication to our sport.

girls
k1s: leqi, zhen, lyd
t1s: carol, mag
k2s: sheryl & gao shang, weiqi & mag, vania & shine, leqi & fengyi
t2s: vania & shine, carol & fengyi

let's go girls! let's kick ass out there! remember, all that we're going to think about from start to end is winning, and we'll not settle for anything less than that. this is what we've worked for since we began training, and we're not about to lose anything now.

guys
you can do it too! yeah i've got confidence that the entire team's going to put in all they have and row like it's their last race. that's all. we'll win this as raffles canoeists, as a college team. let's show the true rafflesian spirit.



and i'm thankful for the fact that i'll have you at the finish line with me.


the titles belong to us.

singing--- hey you! what do you want for your bday present huh? and you better keep in mind that you still owe me a certain m. wahlberg from our deal two years back. anyway a k1 is a single-seater racing kayak, and a k2 is a double-seater racing kayak. they're more streamlined, faster and generally more unstable than the T1 and T2, which are, as you would probably have deduced, a single-seater tourer and a double-seater tourer, respectively. and the kayaks have rudders for direction which is actually quite a good thing, except that i can't seem to use them properly.

ugh just watched the first half of the second leg of the bayern-real match. thanks mag for the wake-up call! heheh. zidane's goal was beautifully opportunistic! bayern defence sleeping! anyway i have nothing but highest respect for zidane, think he's a brilliant player. you wouldn't be able to expect anything less from the world player of the year! casillas made a couple of swell stops as well... smothering makaay's first attempt, ze roberto's blistering shot, and denying makaay just before the break!

that being said, i'm still a fervent FC Bayern supporter.

go Bayern Munich!

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME:
1. the thought of doing k2 with gao shang
2. a-level math
3. gao shang, generally.

THREE PEOPLE WHO MAKE ME LAUGH:
1. the canoeists!
2. quan when she regales me with horror stories of her one and only canoeing experience.
3. jiao4 lian4

THREE THINGS/PEOPLE I LOVE:
1. vania (on pain of death, i shall put this down)
2. rowing k2
3. you.

THREE THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND:
1. why shit happens
2. why i can't balance in a k1
3. why stuff disappears from my locker.

THREE THINGS ON MY DESK:
1. a mess
2. a big mess
3. a REALLY BIG mess.

THREE THINGS I'M DOING RIGHT NOW:
1. typing this
2. discussing possibilities of an orgy with gao shang
3. feeling disgusted at my audacity

THREE THINGS I DO BEFORE I GO TO SLEEP :
1. visualization!
2. pee.
3. no need to do much before i fall asleep in gp, actually.

THREE COLORS I LIKE:
1. red
2. white
3. grey
(fine i'm still an nj loyalist when it comes to their school colors)

THREE THINGS I CAN DO WITHOUT THE HELP OF OTHERS:
1. make pinchuan unable to believe his ears twice within the space of a few minutes (really sorry if i traumatised you, pc)
2. capsize in a k1
3. make people feel guilty about stuffing their faces

THREE WAYS PEOPLE DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY:
1. screwed up
2. strange
3. gym rat.

THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:
1. lick my elbow
2. change the way i am
3. say what i really want to say to whoever i want to say it to

THREE THINGS I THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO:
1. me
2. your parents
3. the government.

THREE THINGS I DON'T THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO
EVER:
1. econs lectures in general
2. gao shang
3. liars.

THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST:
1. "i'll be going to the weights room while you stuff your face at ghim moh..."
2. "you're strange"
3. "screw you, gao shang"

THREE OF YOUR ABSOLUTE FAVORITE FOODS:
now this is difficult. they aren't exactly absolute favorites, just healthy favorites. haha.
1. oatmeal
2. rj yong tau foo
3. subway anythings

THREE SHOWS YOU WATCHED WHEN YOU WERE A KID:
1. teenage mutant ninja turtles
2. sesame street
3. all the disney crap.

lao shi owes us a treat now! the entire class got at least a B for ao chinese! whoopee. heheh got A1 for chinese at last! makes the past year of cheena-ness worth it, i guess. think of the breaks i could have had... stuffing my face at ghim moh or working out at the weights room (according to quan, she thinks i'd rather eat shit and die than do the former). haha. quite an improvement from promos' B4 (and that was only because lao shi took away five marks for every zuo4 wen1 we conveniently neglected to submit, and i didn't hand in two). oh well.

man i'm damn inspired by the j3 canoeing girls! congrats to them for doing so well. so many of them got 4As, and laymay's really good! haha okay i'm aiming for what she achieved. poo which means i'll have to mug my ass off and train like hell. but i'll try.

ugh unofficial training at kallang today, which only carol, lyd, vania and i went for. the three of them ended school at 12:30pm and left straightaway! so i had to cab down myself at 2pm (damn damn pissed! cab fare was ten f**cking bucks! i'm how broke now can). wasted lots of time moving a k2 and k1 around before i could open the paddle cupboard, and when i opened it i realised i couldn't find my paddle. so i tried the lifejacket cupboard, and lo and behold it was there! ughhhh. so i had to move the damned k2 back by myself which was no easy feat. haha but don't worry i didn't handle it roughly or anything... it's RJC 13 which happens to be mine and leqi's competition k2! heheh. then all of a sudden the neurotic guy in charge of sdba (i think) appeared... (the one who reported us to bp for coming down on sun before) and i was damn freaked in case he asked me what i was doing. anyway he keeps on calling me "boy". he called me that twice before. ass.

so anyway i had to pootle around for five minutes pretending to check the boats and shit like that. made a run for it (which wasn't very fast considering the fact that i was shouldering a k1 at the same time) when his back was turned, wobbled to the shore and quickly launched. awful! haha.

sheesh realised i have awful sense of balance. can't do starts in a k1 properly without wobbling! the furthest i made it was twenty-eight hard strokes during starts, and then came a mighty wobble. most unnerving. haha. dang. think i'll have to work on balance. oh well. haha gao shang appeared at the end of our training... at old sdba! from near the dragonboat docking area anyone could almost see up her skirt... but shhhh. ughhh just kidding! i'm not THAT twisted that i wanna look up her skirt... i have better things to do (like look up other people's skirts...) haha!anyway it was a nice surprise. heheh.

ugh boring day as usual. save for one funny bit in the morning during eng lecture when we were watching the tape of a passage to india. evans paused the film at a scene he found particularly thought-provoking, which happened to be one where the camera panned in on a signpost in the Indian city with place names like trafalgar square etc, all the english colonialist shit. he asked "so what's the significance of this particular scene?" then you could hear the expected snatches of mumbled replies like "to show the domination the colonialists have over india blah blah". must have been the lacklustre response that prompted him to venture one step further and ask, in his usual sneering drawl "does singapore have anything of the sort? using silly inappropriate english names?" suddenly from the back, a voice piped up, loud enough for the whole LT to hear:

"yes they do! Evans Rd!"

good one, aaron! ;)

boy i never knew canoeing was chockfull of sexual innuendoes and double entrendres! till yesterday. when leqi related a conversation she had with marcus and leslie that had us in stitches, while leaving weiqi in mock horror. (c'mon wq i know you're as corrupted as us all so quit protesting your innocence)

marcus: i love fengyi!
leqi: i love fengyi too! she's my partner! (she meant k2 partner, you freaks.)
leslie: errrr. partner? so how often do you do it?
leqi: well we go at it twice, maybe three times a week. depends on how things are. not under our control.
leslie: so how do you both do it?
leqi: hmmm one in front and one at the back...
leslie: so what's it like?
leqi: we start real fast, like real hard and fast, but things mellow down after the initial high and we keep it at that rate, constant and steady for the bulk of the time, but towards the end we go all out again!
leslie: and so do you like it?
leqi: it's fantastic! i love doing it!

and so the conversation went...

ugh we were all just thinking of other ways we could well, sex up the image of canoe practice and someone came up with the idea that yeah, we even use protection all the time! (in the form of life jackets, you jerks). if i remember correctly, gs was rather animated and lively during this conversation. well it's normal, since this IS her element after all. and who else could be half as experienced but her?

well yes and i guess canoeing DOES get you all hot sweaty and bothered. not forgetting the incredible wetness. and the glorious thrill of skimming over the water coupled with the adrenaline rush of rowing and winning every race... does it deserve to rank up there with "orgasmic"? hmm.


god i can't hardly wait till the next time. we could just keep going on and on... ;)



----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
hey
if we can't find a way out of these problems
then maybe we don't need this
standing face to face
enemies at war we build defences
and secret hiding places

i might need you to hold me tonight
i might need you to say it's alright
i might need you to make the first stand
because tonight i'm finding it hard to be your man

hey
more than angry words i hate this silence
it's getting so loud
well i want to scream
but bitterness has silenced these emotions
it's getting hard to breathe

so tell me isn't happiness
worth more than a gold diamond ring
i'm willing to do anything
to calm the storm in my heart
i've never been the praying kind
but lately i've been down upon my knees
not looking for a miracle
just a reason to believe

i might need you to hold me tonight
i might need you to say it's alright
i might need you to make the first stand
because tonight i'm finding it hard to be your man

do you remember not long ago
when we used to live for the nighttime
cherish each moment
now we don't live we exist
we just run through our lives
so alone
that's why you've got to hold me

hey
if we can't find a way out of these problems
then maybe we don't need this
standing face to face
enemies at war we build defences
and secret hiding places

i might need you to hold me tonight
i might need you to say it's alright
i might need you to make the first stand
because tonight i'm finding it hard to be your man

savage garden :: hold me
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
to you: well i don't know if you know how special you are to me. and i don't dare to find out just yet. i guess some things are just better left unsaid. i don't want to ruin the thing we have going right now...

okay i've linked leqi's album containing indoor rowing photos!
check it out on the right column under "snapshots!"


RJC 01 team photo. from right: shuyi, me, philip, leqi.

[RJC 01] national indoor rowing c'ships 2004


WE DID IT!


WE ACHIEVED WHAT WE SET OUT TO DO FROM THE VERY START.
WE SAID WE WOULDN'T SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS THAN FIRST PLACE
AND LOOK, HERE WE ARE.
=============================================================

to my first rower and newfound friend, shuyi:
thanks dude! you were awesome! it's been a pleasure getting to know you too. now you're no longer one of the faceless, nameless entities of rj but someone i actually know and appreciate. you provided our team with a great start and hey, you didn't fall off your seat either! thanks so much man.

especially for my second rower, beloved k2 partner and fab pal, leqi:
oh god what can i say. you were wonderful. thanks for the psychological and physical support! you're always there when i need you. i absolutely love rowing with you. let's translate our success here into similar ones on the water! sdba in three weeks let's show the world what we're made of. we can do it we're gonna thrash nj. have faith (and more protein bars haha). i love you.

and this goes out to my fourth rower and great friend, philip:
hey man! okay there's nothing i can say that you don't already know. you were fantastic. you single-handedly maneuvered us into first place. i admire your fighting spirit! and thanks for getting us all so psyched up. you're the one who had the belief that we'd be able to clinch the title and not just settle for second best. thanks for the motivation. keep the spirit alive for sdba and nationals!

well,RJC01, we truly lived up to our name. it's been an honour rowing with you, shuyi. you, leqi. and you, philip. thanks once again.




=============================================================

man i'm dead on my feet after an entire day of machine rowing! only found out that i was entered in the indiv1000m race at 4am this morning. not surprisingly, i was unable to go back to sleep after that. wasn't really prepared for the 1000m as i hadn't rowed anything close to that amount since the totaldefence day race. and i only realised that i hadn't adjusted my resistance until 4 seconds to start! awful! was leading for first 500m but wasn't able to sustain and dropped to 3rd. oh well. anyway i managed to better my timing by 4seconds, to 4:04min. wasn't really chionging for 1000m, conserving precious energy for the mixed relay later.

which was a good idea.

heats were not bad. we managed to sustain a pretty decent lead throughout the race which was good. finished with a timing of 7:08min. managed to slash our previous timing by 22sec! marvelous huh. and gao shang took nice pictures of us rowing! woohoo.

finals were awesome, courtesy of philip. in second place throughout from the start, till the last 500m where philip just gave it his all and shot us past the throwers to first position. we definitely couldn't have done it without him. the feeling of capturing the title was exhilarating, pure ecstasy, something i want over and over again.

leqi and i were absolutely euphoric! took lots of pictures that i'll post someday when she sends them to me. great day. got so much more than i bargained for. rj totally dominated the entire competition haha. i mean, 16 rj teams contrasted with a smattering of teams from other schools! rather amusing, really. makes us seem super-enthusiastic.

well it was a great time to get to know others better as well as a time to bond with the canoeists. thanks everyone who was cheering us on, and huilin i admire your strength and tenacity to row out that agonizing 2000m! wonderful senior you are. thanks especially to qing and xy who came down to support us! gosh i owe you two a big treat! hey tell me when you guys are free yeah. we need to do a spot of catching-up as well! went out with brandon chengshi shuyi and leqi after that, caught "along came polly" before leaving for home.

good job to all the fellow rj rowers! the trackers, throwers, shuttlers, air rifle ppl, odac ppl, ssc ppl and all else... and in particular the canoeists, the people i've truly gone through thick and thin with. let's go all out for SDBA! three weeks to the championships. only a couple more trainings left... let's make the most out of them!



we're not just going there to compete
we're going to WIN!

there used to be a greying tower alone on the sea
you became the light on the dark side of me
love remained a drug that's the high and not the pill
but did you know that when it snows
my eyes become large and the light that you shine can be seen

baby i compare you to a kiss from a rose on the grey
ooh, the more i get of you
stranger it feels, yeah
and now that your rose is in bloom
a light hits the gloom on the grey

there is so much a man can tell you
so much he can say
you remain my power, my pleasure, my pain
baby to me you're like a growing addiction that i can't deny
won't you tell me is that healthy, baby
but did you know that when it snows
my eyes become large
and the light that you shine can be seen

baby i compare you to a kiss from a rose on the grey
ooh, the more i get of you
stranger it feels, yeah
and now that your rose is in bloom
a light hits the gloom on the grey

i've been kissed by a rose on the grey
i've been kissed by a rose
i've been kissed by a rose on the grey
and if i should fall along the way
i've been kissed by a rose
been kissed by a rose on the grey

there is so much a man can tell you
so much he can say
you remain my power, my pleasure, my pain
baby to me you're like a growing addiction that i can't deny
won't you tell me is that healthy, baby
but did you know that when it snows
my eyes become large
and the light that you shine can be seen

baby i compare you to a kiss from a rose on the grey
ooh, the more i get of you
stranger it feels, yeah
and now that your rose is in bloom
a light hits the gloom on the grey
yes i compare you to a kiss from a rose on the grey
ooh, the more i get of you
stranger it feels, yeah

and now that your rose is in bloom
a light hits the gloom on the grey
now that your rose is in bloom
a light hits the gloom on the grey

seal \\ kiss from a rose

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

weiqi, this song's for you! you're right, it IS a unbelievable song. i can't stop myself from playing it over and over now.

shall blog about the events over the past few days.

fri
total defence day celebrations! was too psyched up the whole day over machine rowing which was only going to take place in the afternoon. quite nervous initially, because of the throwers we were up against. seeing aaron having to be helped off the machine after his 2000m race kind of made me wary of what was going to happen later. gosh i died rowing 1km. i guess you don't really feel it when you're on the rowing machine pulling like hell on the cable, until you get off, or try to get off. the four minutes eight seconds i was on the rower felt like an eternity. the figures went by so slowly i could have given up any time. i'm thankful i didn't or i would never have forgiven myself for that. i guess i was in a trance-like state for most of the race, eyes fixed on the mini lcd screen, not even bothering to look up at the projection screen where you could see computerized positions of the boats, that i didn't even know i was catching up with audry.

anyway i just died totally after the race. couldn't even drag myself off the machine, gao shang had to somehow unentangle me from the seat and manouvre me off. couldn't move for a whole five minutes after that. now i know what it's like to have leaden legs. and apparently my lips were blue during and after the race. man. after i finally got up i wobbled downstairs to the canteen (backwards down the stairs, it's easier that way) and up again. anyway i'm totally in awe of michelle! she beat me by an entire ten seconds. nothing but total respect. anyway i'm glad that i managed 2nd.

relay was good too! i was just raring to go and you could just see the look of intense concentration of aaron's face just before the race started. he handed us a good lead that we managed to maintain and that philip even widened. i think i much prefer sprinting over shorter distances like 500m to stupid 1k races. we were so happy with our time of 7min 30sec and our 2nd position again. (as expected, the throwers were in a league of their own). thanks aaron, leqi and philip. you guys were great! canoeists' never-say-die spirit. look forward to next sunday's relay! let's make sure we get something out of that. oh and kudos to all the other canoeists who were cheering us on during our relay! we were doing the same for you too. let's keep the team spirit going.

sat
training in the morning which i always look forward to. k2 with leqi, extremely good as usual. challenged to a 250m race with a j3 in a t1, whom we promptly beat by a substantial distance. hope he got a kick out of that, because we sure did. hey canoeists check this link out... there's a picture of jiao4 lian4 and his full name! haha the fact that nobody ever seems to know his full name dawned on us the other day.
anyway we had a blast after training at kenny rogers' at suntec... pictures speak a thousand words, so wait for me to put pictures up when sheryl and zhen send them to me. let's just say some of them are rather dubious photos that will have you doubting our principles (or lack thereof). and many of them feature someone's ample assets. *wink gs* i think i shall sign off now. eyes are killing me.

till then...

think i better leave right now
before i fall any deeper
think i better leave right now
i'm feeling weaker and weaker
somebody better show me how
before i fall any deeper


i think i'd better leave right now.

as usual, leqi, it was a pleasure rowing with you today. thanks partner.

leqi and i both agree wholeheartedly that there should be a 2km event. it's fabulous on the return 1km leg. indescribable feeling- the adrenaline rush and being secure in the knowledge that you'll be able to catch any boat that's in front of you, given the 1000m leeway you have. but too bad that there isn't 2km! so we'll just have to settle for shorter distances. water was pretty bad today, wind so overwhelmingly blustery, that we found it extremely difficult to paddle, but it was a good chance to get used to inclement weather conditions. you'll never know what raceday conditions will be like. the 500m practices and starts were good too. it was one of those training sessions that i felt were very fruitful and worth the while. anyway we can only get better. mag, weiqi, hope you guys get well soon. and don't worry too much, there's still time.

i'm really psyched up for sdba c'ships. gunning for the title.
i'll give it all i've got. i'll train till all my strength's drained.
i'm not alone in this.

it's a beautiful feeling, knowing the whole team's with you.

|[raffles canoeists :: 2003-2004]|

man i haven't heard this song for ages! was doing weights in bishan gym on monday when i heard the familiar strains on perfect 10... it's a pretty nice song.

------------------------------------------------------------------------
constantly girl you're on my mind
girl i think about you all of the time
and even no words are hard to say
girl i miss you, never thought i'd feel this way

if you keep on taking
my heart you'll be breaking
so why do you do this to me
you know how i'm feeling
it's you i believe in
baby can't you see that i need you

you know that it's true
every time i see your face i miss you lady
you know that it's you
i wanna let you know you're driving me crazy
i'd do anything to help you to see
i don't think you understand what you're doing to me
you know that it's true
every now and then i wanna call you lately
you know that it's you
i send a prayer that you'll come back to me lady
oh yeah
i feel anything alone, can't you see
you're an angel in my eyes
everyday you're closer to me

nobody's there when i call your name
and nights are cold girl without your flame
nights are cold girl without your flame
but if i could girl i'd make you see
i'd make you see, yeah
that i'm sorry
------------------------------------------------------------------------
five closer to me

just finished my econs essay on market failure, and i realised i didn't lose my notes after all! they were just filed away somewhere under "mathematics", which is probably why it took me so long to find them. weights training today (what's new?), pretty uneventful, and intervals after that. i was down with a bout of flu (sore throat, one blocked and one runny nostril, quite disconcerting really) but still did the 2 x 2.4km with 12min rest in between. haha was quite worried initially about all those horror stories where fit people just drop dead because they overexert when they're sick, but still pushed myself to run anyway. managed 13.04min for first 2.4 and 13.20min for the next one. at least i didn't feel too sick when i was running. hopefully i can slash my timing when i get better... was far from top form! i guess i don't ever want to miss training because every session really counts a lot, and i'm perpetually afraid my standard will deterioriate (it's so much easier to lose it all than build it up) if i miss training. it's become an integral part of my life. i could even go as far as to say that i absolutely love training, but then people will just think i'm weird, which is what they probably already do. well perhaps they're right. i was just thinking to myself that canoeing's such an important part of my life that i just want to continue even after As. oh and besides, i never want to hear stray whispers from my juniors "hey look! she's gone all fat and pasty!" if i come back to visit. NEVER. pasty is disgusting. eurrgghh. i don't want to be reduced to a pale, viscous, gently pulsating glob of lard. gross.

well anyway, as i was saying, training's extremely important to me! i love pushing myself to my limit. it just gives me that adrenaline rush and immense sense of satisfaction which is irreplaceable. i'm looking forward to SDBA invitationals. let's go all out and thrash everyone else man. everyone says gold for nationals isn't attainable, that nj's too strong. well they might be stronger, but we're not going to give up without a fight. raffles all the way man! let's prove to everyone that we can be as good, if not better, than them. why can't we, anyway?

man i'm all psyched up, and it's the middle of the night.

hmm. better go sleep now. long day tomorrow with soccer practice!

blog sometime again haha.

to my utmost horror, i've realised that i actually think the song "toxic" by britney spears is damn good! well okay maybe not damn good, but still good! ah whatever.

stuff's been pretty good lately. lots of j1 girls seem to be interested in canoeing, and those who came down on monday were a pretty nice bunch. and one of them can even do 2 pullups! yeahh we need that sort. let's hope that they stay on then. unfortunately after introductions and all i've already acquired an awful reputation as Porn Director (courtesy of gao shang, my Porn Star). screw you, gao shang. whichever way you want it.

after 2.4km timed trial yesterday, i've suddenly found the long-lost motivation to run. aiming for a 12min flat run but it'll take some time. but at least i'm getting there! did about a total of 7km today which is alright i guess.

my hair sucks can.

kept nodding off during tutorials today. especially during evans' classes. tried to keep on writing in my semi-conscious state just so hopefully he wouldn't notice my shut eyelids, and after i more or less woke up i realised it was all a bunch of gibberish. during one of these episodes during eng lecture i almost wrote a rather dubious word down, then jerked awake and caught myself just in time. sheesh.

did weights during chinese break today (finally there's no chinese for me any longer!) which was altogether very satisfying. threw in sets of dumbbell flys in between and now lyd thinks i'm crazy. then again, everyone thinks the canoeists are crazy (well perhaps i'm the craziest of them all) and so i don't give a shit.

had better do stuff for girls' soccer. haven't had practice in ages! which reminds me that i haven't played basketball in eons as well. anyway some ass poached my basketball from my locker during the hols (the one i got for my birthday and signed by the nygeppers) and i have absolutely no clue who it might be. oh and that's not all. the dude was so kind as to leave me a rotten grey volleyball in place. yeah i guess i ought to be appreciative, but it's hard, understandably.

been mugging. really have to hit the books early this year. i've got so much j1 stuff that hasn't really been cleared, and econs 's' to handle as well! ugh. i shall be a chao mugger this year. my life revolves solely around canoeing and studies. no life! at least canoeing is undoubtebly very fulfilling. it's a welcome break from mugging, which is why i like training so much. and the team is great!

***
to sheryl weiqi leqi lyd zhen carol vania mag shine and... err. gaoshang ;)
hello my teammates! just to let you guys know, you make my life so much better!
train hard while mugging hard as well and we're gonna take the sdba championships just like last year!
if you need me, i'll be in the back seat! ;)

love you guys so much
-fengyi
***
someday somehow gonna make it alright but not right now
i know you're wondering when

fuck those rumours. it's been an awful day and it's not getting any better.

==========================================
loose lips sunk ships
i'm getting to grips
with what you said
no it's not in my head
i can't awaken the dead
day after day

why don't we talk about it
why do you always doubt
that there can be a better way
it doesn't make me wanna stay

why don't we break up
there's nothing left to say
i've got my eyes shut
praying they won't stray
and we're not sexed up
that's what makes the difference today
i hope you blow away

you say we're fatally flawed
well i'm easily bored
is that okay
write me off your list
make this the last kiss
i'll walk away

why don't we talk about it
i'm only here don't shout it
given time we'll forget
let's pretend we never met

why don't we break up
there's nothing left to say
i've got my eyes shut
praying they won't stray
and when i'm sexed up
that's what makes the difference today
i hope you blow away

screw you
i didn't like your taste anyway
i chose you
and that's all gone to waste
it's saturday
i'll go out
and find another you

why don't we

why don't we break up
there's nothing left to say
i've got my eyes shut
praying they won't stray
and when i'm sexed up
that's what makes the difference today
i hope you blow away
i hope you blow away
i hope you blow away

away
blow away
==========================================

robbie williams sexed up

be flying off in a couple of hours. on my way to Frankfurt! and from then on to switzerland and paris somewhat later. haven't really gotten into the travelling mood yet- i keep forgetting im supposed to be heading for the airport in less than 5 hours.

well don't have much that i want to blog about anyway. had land training with huilin leqi and weiqi this morning, which was pretty good. then again how bad can land training be? but i had awful stitches during the run- luckily there were traffic lights so i could bend over and touch my toes. haha. headed for j8 to do more CIP later, which wasn't entirely bad in itself, but rather expectedly boring. but talking to weiqi and gao shang managed to alleviate the boredom successfully.

also finished what i set out to do.

wow im damn tired think i'm becoming an insomniac- stayed up late last night to finish some important xmas stuff and i really couldn't sleep after that- guess there're just too many things on my mind. sad things.

well then- think i'll leave off now. have fun everyone, i'll be back on the 2nd! hahaa!


==========================================
to the girl who's perfect to me (you know who you are)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
you look into my eyes
i go out of my mind
i can't see anything
cause this love's got me blind
i can't help myself
i can't break the spell
i can't even try

i'm in over my head
you got under my skin
i've got no strength at all
in the state that i'm in
and my knees are weak
and my mouth can't speak
fell too far this time

baby, i'm too lost in you
caught in you
lost in everything about you
so deep, i can't sleep
i can't think
i just think about the things that you do (you do)
i'm too lost in you
(too lost in you)

ooh
well you whispered to me
and i shiver inside
you undo me and move me
in ways undefined
and you're all i see
and you're all i need
help me baby (help me baby)
help me baby (help me now)

cause i'm slipping away
like the sand to the tide
falling into your arms
falling into your eyes
if you get too near
i might disappear
i might lose my mind

i'm going in crazy in love for you baby
(i can't eat and i can't sleep)
i'm going down like a stone in the sea
yeah no one can mess with me
(no one can mess with me)

oooh, my baby
oooh, baby, baby

i'm too lost in you

---------------------------------------------------------------------------
sugababes too lost in you

it's been a pretty good week! and i've blown alot of cash on stuff!
1. arsenal home jersey (with ljungberg name and no.! and epl sleeve patches!)
2. aiwa md player
3. sony digicam (okay i didnt really pay for this one, my parents did, but that's even better!)
4. bayern munich champs league jersey which i got today! yeah yeah yeah!

oh and i checked out the bugis village place opp. bugis junction where they have lots of damn cool clothes yesterday, meaning to go to this particular stall where they sell adidas retro jackets and other throwback stuff like nba jerseys and all! so i went there and was looking for a nice jacket when i stumbled across this bayern munich jacket! man i was darned happy. well yes.
so...
5. bayern munich jacket!

can you tell i love BAYERN MUNICH? yes yes they're second in the bundesliga now!

well shit im damned poor now la so. hahaha.

on my way to training on monday, i got off the bus at the kallang bus stop and guess who i saw crossing the road? junyi! hahaha! (for those who know about the stupid sec1 thingummy, good for you! damn paiseh la.) man it's been a long time really! especially since he went to perth for studies and came back for the hols. pretty good to catch up with him (he's doing ns at the police coast guard at kallang) especially since i've only had the opportunity to talk to him online! yeah so was quite pleasantly surprised!

it's been a week of meeting people! today on my way home from peninsula shopping centre i changed to NEL at dhoby ghaut interchange and met liwei! that was really great! especially since i don't get to see her that much due to our clashing schedules and all that shit! man i've missed her!

i've missed a lot of people. especially those i haven't seen in real eons- like the NJC 03a01 people (how are you guys man?) and the NYgeppers! man! training takes up a whole lot of time but i'd love to meet you guys!

PICTURE OF THE DAY


Defender Sammy Kuffour and skipper Oliver Kahn lovingly entwined after Bayern Munich's 1-0 Champions League victory against Anderlecht


Bayern 1 Anderlecht 0
Munich edge into last sixteen

10.12.2003 | Bayern claimed a place in the Champions League last sixteen on Wednesday night thanks to a first-half Roy Makaay penalty and some solid defending against Anderlecht in the second half, although Oliver Kahn had to rescue the win with a brilliant save deep into stoppage time.

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kudos to roy makaay and olli kahn! the best players in the world.
long live deutscher meister FC Bayern!